Serve with integrity. Care about those you serve. Share the love in your heart & soul.

Tuesday, April 22, 2008

#415 AARP Forum

I doubt that any of these apply to you and I KNOW they can't possible apply to ME; but they will be fun to think about when we are looking at others!

Questions and Answers from an AARP Forum

Q:
Where can men over the age of 60 find younger, sexy women who are interested in them?
A: Try a bookstore-------under fiction.

Q:
What can a man do while his wife is going through menopause?
A: Keep busy. If you're handy with tools, you can finish the basement. When you are done you will have a place to live.


Q:
Someone has told me that menopause is mentioned in the Bible. Is that true? Where can it be found?
A: Yes. Matthew 14:92: 'And Mary rode Joseph's ass all the way to Egypt.'

Q:
How can you increase the heart rate of your 60+ year old husband?
A: Tell him you're pregnant.

Q:
How can you avoid that terrible curse of the elderly-----wrinkles?
A: Take off your glasses

Q:
Seriously! What can I do for these crow's feet and all those wrinkles on my face?
A: Go braless. It will usually pull them out.

Q:
Why should 60+ year old people use valet parking?
A: Valets don't forget where they park your car.

Q:
Is it common for 60+ year olds to have problems with short term memory storage?
A: Storing memory is not a problem, retrieving it is a problem.

Q:
As people age, do they sleep more soundly?
A: Yes, but usually in the afternoon.

Q:
Where should 60+ year olds look for eye glasses?
A: On their foreheads.

Q:
What is the most common remark made by 60+ year olds when they enter antique stores?
A: 'Gosh, I remember these.'

#415

3 comments:

Skunkfeathers said...

Contrary to some folks' belief, I did NOT write any of those...tho' I may be living proof of them in a very few years...

bronxbt said...

nothing like reading some posts from dear friends early in my work day... only to stumble across this one and i've now experience yet again; coffee outta my nose.

thanks jack...

b

The Phosgene Kid said...

And conversations usually start out with, "Remember when...?"