onandon. You commented about a self-fulfilling prophecy study done many years ago. I am familiar with that study. In fact one of my students from this past weekend told me a variation of it. In this variation the teacher was a first year teacher, the class was the worst and the results were the best. When the school principal complimented her on her outstanding job, she was asked how she was able to do it with such an unlikely, and "stupid" group. The new teacher replied that how could they be considered stupid when their IQ's were all well above 120. She even showed the principal the original roster showing the numbers. The principal then informed her that those numbers were the students' locker numbers.
These studies are true for adults as well as children. When you expect the best you will receive the best.
As for your: Alas my expectations of what 'friendship' meant was ( as you know) dashed upon the rocks of experience. How do I get it back?
You get it back by giving it. You give it without the expectation of having it reciprocated. Watch MP. He is your role model on this subject. From what you have said, he will converse with anyone. He does not always come away from the conversation with a friend, but he usually does not come away with a new enemy. My guess is, that he expects the possibility of a new friend, and he allows the other to decide whether that friendship is to be. We are not always going to be friends with everyone, even our "closest" relatives.
We have a saying: "You can catch more flies with honey than with vinegar." Personally, I was never sure why I wanted flies in the first place. You get the idea.
In a nut shell, it all starts with you. What you show others is what you will see from them. You want love, give love. You want respect, give respect. One final comment on this--to make this work, you must love and respect yourself first.
onandon, you are a person worthy of love and respect. We have never met personally, and yet I both love and respect you as a person of great worth.
Watch and listen to MP. He is your guide as you are his.
#136
4 comments:
If you don't know what Jack knows;
You don't know Jack! Great blog, Jack. Keep it coming. Found u by accident but I will bounce back thru for the read....really, I'm just here for the reading. :D
"Wear a smile and have friends; wear a scowl and have wrinkles. What do we live for if not to make the world less difficult for each other?"
Author: George Eliot
Karen, you always say the nicest things. Thanks.
m d, if you liked that you might find Things I've Stumbled Across Along the Way of interest.
Thank you for this personal post.
I have always behaved like this. I can't go back to those who treated me so shabbily. It means I have no self respect at all.
Wow this MP of mine sure is perfect, isn't he?
I must present him exactly how he is. Aren't I a lucky one then?
Love you too, you old codger, you.
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