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Wednesday, July 27, 2011

#832 Early Retirement Bonus

It's a little "blue" and funny as all get out.

If this doesn't make you laugh, you are truly humor impaired!

The Air Force found they had too many officers and decided to offer an early retirement bonus. They promised any officer who volunteered for Retirement a bonus of $1,000 for every inch measured in a straight line between any Two points in his body.. The officer got to choose what those two points would be.

The first officer who accepted asked that he be measured from the top of his head to the tip of his toes. He was measured at six feet and walked out with a bonus of $72,000.

The second officer who accepted was a little smarter and asked to be measured from the tip of his outstretched hands to his toes. He walked Out with $96,000.

The third officer was an old mustang (former enlisted swine) , a grizzly old major, who, when asked where he would like to be measured replied, 'From the tip of my weenie to my testicles.'

It was suggested by the pension man that he might want to reconsider, explaining about the nice big checks the previous two Officers had received. But the old major insisted and they decided to go along with him providing the measurement was taken by a Medical Officer.

The Medical Officer arrived and instructed the Major to 'drop 'em,' which he did. The medical officer placed the tape measure on the tip of the Major's weenie and began to work back. "Dear Lord!", he suddenly exclaimed, ''Where are your testicles?''
The old Major calmly replied, '' Vietnam ''.

I Love This Country!
It's The Government That
Scares The Hell Outa Me!!!


1 comment:

Sandee said...

Bwahahahahahahaha. Yep, this is a good one indeed.

Have a terrific day. :)